I was travelling to Lagos from Ibadan recently and a lady’s eating habit caught my attention, though she was well dressed and looking sophisticated; she bought almost everything that comes her way and chewed as if her next breathe depends on how fast she munches.
However, something strikes me about her, despite all her effort to look polished, her real self crept in when she was least oblivious of it.
Erving Goffman, in his Dramaturlogical conception posits that; human interaction and of course relationship is but mere performance i.e. life is just like a theatre with a backstage (your rehearsal) and a front stage (acting out the dimension you have rehearsed) and if the perceptions of others of you is in consonance with your desirability, you feel gratified and fulfilled.
Now the question is this: why would I parade a false impression of myself? Why can’t I just be Me? As God’s fearfully and wonderfully made creation. You have an IDENTITY: why would you want to live out what or whom you’re not? Is your life and living in consonance with your creator’s desirability?
IDENTITY, according to the Oxford English dictionary is who or what someone or something is- being the same. Your features and potentials distinct you, you cannot be me no matter how hard you try and I can’t be you.
I remember some years back, a cloth was gifted to my father and he was compelled to wear it, which he did. Sometimes later I saw the exact cloth (the same texture, fabric, brand and even colour) on a hoodlum (agbero), at first I felt bad and then a thought cheered me up “…look at how dirty and unkempt this man looks but your dad always look so neat, trim and even younger in his and then he goes about with beautiful strides and carriage”…what makes him unique and distinct from the agbero?..his Identity, who he is.
I like to believe that we are in this world for an appointed and limited time span and that no matter the number of years you have lived and will still live, this world is not your permanent habitat; therefore quit the drama, stop acting another man’s script- Be YOU! stop being an ‘agbero’ in this world, be the Kingdom Child that you are; showcasing the ‘POTENTIALS’ your Father in heaven has so much embedded in you, so that those that see you radiate His glory will long to follow your path to the one true creator of the universe.
Don’t lose sight of whom you are, live the most fulfilled life you can and make the best impact you can. You can’t be your ‘REAL SELF’ and yet be acting, because the ‘REAL YOU’ is innate and it just becomes apparent when you don’t act.
Remember, Life is a drama with many cast, don’t be lost in the crowd, STAND OUT! Maintain who you are (your identity) even in this dramatic world.
Oyedokun Omobolanle Deborah
For Debbiesarena Team